Never Been Kissed! Dark Angel Style
by Vkitty
Summary: AU. Max Guevara doesn't usually have anything to do with the journalism squad at Weekly World News, but when a friend asks her to go undercover at a high school, she can't say no. ML
1. Chapter 1

Penelope Tinga was a high school drop-out. She'd dropped out for a number of reasons: the biggest being Max, her seven-year-old son, and Case, her one-month-old son. Case's father was off working in Portland, Oregon, trying to earn enough money to get their small family a house. Meanwhile, Penny (who was known more commonly by her last name) worked as a waitress in a restaurant in Seattle.

It was there, as luck would have it, that she met Max.

You see, Crash Bar and Grill was a haven for most working people who aren't earning nearly enough to support themselves – so they work the nightshifts at Crash. The staff mostly included high-school drop-outs, college drop-outs and ITT school drop-outs. Actually, Tinga would be that Max was the only person on the staff that had finished all four years of college and had a stable job.

Tinga and Max had become fast friends – both being basically the only women their age on the job. Tinga learned that Max was 22 and fresh out of college. She'd gotten a pretty good job at a pretty good newspaper that raked in pretty good cash. Max had even offered to try and get Tinga a job as an entry level something-or-other, but Tinga declined. She knew what she was good at, and that was waitressing and occasionally bartending.

But Tinga always knew she'd have to explore other venues eventually, she just didn't know it would have to be very soon.

"Tinga!" Hammer the bartender shouted. "Phone for you!"

"Thanks," Tinga said, rushing to the counter. She went through the door into the back and took the phone from Hammer. "Hello?"

"_Hello, this is a call for Penelope Tinga?" _

"Speaking," Tinga said.

"_We are calling from Washington Meridian Insurance company about the application that you submitted." _

"Yeah?" Tinga asked, her heart beating a little bit faster. More money was definitely good. _If _these people were hiring her, of course.

"_We'd like you to start immediately." _

* * *

**A/N: So, since the success of my first Dark Angel crossover story, Bring It On! Dark Angel Style, I've decided to make other crossover stories. Firstly, though, I thought I'd make one for all of the M/L lovers who weren't really into my last one, so here it is! Mostly though, this is just a teaser. I'm still trying to decide if I want to work on this. **


	2. Chapter 2

Max woke up the very same morning with a very bad feeling in her stomach. Something bad was going to happen today – she just knew it.

She pulled herself out of bed and moseyed into the living room to make coffee.

Then, bad thing number one happened. Max stopped in the middle of the living room, squinted at the form on the couch, then backed up a little bit.

"Alec?" she asked groggily. A groan was her answer. "What are you doing here?" A groan that sounded something like 'damn super' was her answer this time. "I thought you gave me back your key when you moved out." This time, Alec groaned and rolled over, pulling a pillow over his ears.

"No, really!" Max stomped over to where Alec was lying prostrate on the sofa. She yanked the pillow away and smacked his head. "How the hell did you get in my house?"

"Kendra let me in," Alec told her, glaring at her. "Can't you let me sleep in peace? I've had a long night!"

Max knew he probably did have a long night, and she knew that really the polite thing to do would be to turn around and make some coffee for herself so that she could get a Folgers' start on her day. But when did Max ever do the polite thing?

"KENDRA!" Max shouted at the top of her lungs. "KENDRA!"

"She went to work a few hours ago," Alec mumbled from the sofa. "Are you making breakfast or what?"

"You don't _deserve _breakfast," Max spat. With that, she turned on her heel and stalked into the kitchen. Alec sat up.

"You aren't still mad about that whole test tube baby thing, are you?" Alec asked. "Because that totally wasn't my fault."

"Not your fault?" Max responded, slamming the jug of water she'd been holding down. "_Not your fault?" _She stomped her foot – something she usually did when she argued with Alec. "I'm not even angry about that! I'm angry because you got me fired!" Alec was silent for a second.

"Oh," he said in a low voice. "Well, how was I supposed to know that hot Daphne chick was your boss?"

"I had the perfect job and you ruined it!" Max screamed. "You slept with my boss – three times! And then you didn't even answer her calls when she tried to contact you – then you fucking came to my work to give me flowers!"

"It was your _birthday!" _

"My birthday was three months before that, you idiot," Max told him. "And you missed my birthday, because you were at a strip club with Sketchy!" Alec had been about to say something – but he stopped right before he said it.

He settled for, "So he told you that, huh?" Max nodded.

"Uh huh. So you'd understand why I'm not exactly lining up to join the Alec McDowell Fan Club right now," she snapped. Max hit the message machine, causing it to start the messages. She got more messages at night (drunk Sketchy, horny Cindy – stuff like that) rather than in the day time.

_You have five unheard messages. _

_First message, sent 11:44 PM. _

"_Max? I r… really need a ride home right now… I'm t- I'm walking down this alley and I think there's a z… zo… OH MY GOD, THERE IT IS! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, MAX! THE INFESTATION IS HERE!" _

_Second message, sent 1:12 AM. _

"_Hey, boo. This Original Cindy. Just wanted to remind you there's a meeting in the morning that you really shouldn't miss. Director's gonna be there and everythang. See you bright an' early. Bye."_

_Third message, sent 1:37 AM. _

"_Hey, Max! It's Tinga and I just wanted to see if you were up to ask you a favor. I've got some seriously good news so call me when you get the message. Bye!" _

_Fourth message, sent 3:43 AM. _

"_Max, this is Sketchy… bring some Tylenol with you to work, willya?"_

_Fifth message, sent 4:56 AM. _

"_Man, I smell good! You know what that smell is? It's the smell of open-heart surgery! That's right. Your little Jondy-bear got to touch an actual human heart! Call me later for all the details!" _

_End of messages. _

Alec was now at the counter. "So I suppose you won't be calling Jondy back for all the details?" he asked as Max shut off the message machine.

"Shut up and get the Midol from the bathroom," Max ordered, hearing someone knock on the door. "Get that first."

"Why?" Alec whined.

"Because I told you to!" Max shouted. She sighed. "Besides, it's probably that damn tweenie chick downstairs. You know, the one that can barely see over her own implants enough to get up the st-" Alec was at the door in the blink of an eye, only to open it and find Mrs. Moreno – the _real _downstairs neighbor.

"Oh, hello," Mrs. Moreno said. "I just wanted to make sure that everything was all right with that _wonderful _girl who lives here. I heard loud bumps and shouts."

"She's fine," Alec backtracked. "Just a little grumpy. Woke up on the wrong side of the bed, you know?"

"ALEC!" Max yelled again. Alec said goodbye to Mrs. Moreno and shut the door quickly.

"Well, you didn't throw anything at me this time," he said with a smile. "_That _means you're maturing, Maxie." Well, actually, he only got out "Well, youdidn't throw an -" before he had to duck from the saucer sent hurtling his way.

"Get out of my house!"

- - - -

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait, I'm just sort of going through a batch of writer's block here.**

**Reviews might help, though. **


End file.
